Is it normal for me as a 22-year-old female to be scared of dying and getting old?

6 Answers

  • Most people feel uneasy about aging and death, but it’s not really a problem unless you are excessively afraid, or when it interferes with your life choices and decisions. 

    Getting old is no picnic, but because it happens so gradually, minute by minute, over several decades, you just go with the flow.. it’s a natural progression. It’s also a trade-off..

    At 68, I miss my smooth skin, shiny hair, and attractive body. I miss putting on makeup and cute clothes and feeling desirable. I would love to be slender again, to do cartwheels down the street on my way home from school, and for my body to feel vibrant and strong. 

    On the other hand, I’m wiser and calmer; I wouldn’t want to be my younger (naive, confused, anxiety-ridden) self again for anything. In my teens, 20’s, and 30’s, life was filled with one drama after another. If a relationship ended I thought I would die. Some heartaches took years to get over. Even friendships were proverbial rollercoasters that had periods of hurt, or not speaking (and usually over minor grievances). Misunderstandings with friends, lovers, teachers, family members, bosses, etc., were common because I had not yet learned how to understand others’ viewpoints, and to empathize. 

    Marriage was another merry-go-round. It starts out good, but then you discover that it isn’t easy trying to compromise with someone you have to live with. You really have to work at it because it’s real life — it’s not the romantic thrill that dating is. But if you do it right — respect and support each other — it can be very rewarding to have someone to lean on during the down periods, and to love you and to share the responsibilities.

    When I was young, it was an ego trip to have guys whistle and fuss over me, yet, it made me very uncomfortable to go anywhere, and I hated having to try and come up with ways to turn them down without hurting their feelings. But when I got fatter and older, it was a huge relief to be able to walk out of the house in my comfy clothes with my stringy hair tossed up in a clip, and no makeup except for a little lipstick. What freedom!

    My work life was challenging too. I had many menial jobs where I wanted to just jump out of my skin. At the end, I had a rather brief career that I loved.. but life is full of beginnings and endings, and my working life ended. 

    Today, I kind of like the way my gray hair softens my face. I love having all the time in the world to read my books and try new crafts, like making jewelry and handmade books. I volunteer at a cat shelter and I fall in love with every cat that comes my way. I go out for coffee or to book stores and arts festivals with my sisters and my friends. I have learned a lot about who I am and who I was — and I like who I am so much more than I did at 22. 

    Sometimes I notice the changes, such as drier skin and age spots.. but it doesn’t bother me like a single little zit did when I was 16. A zit used to send me into a panic. Today, I see another new mole and I’m like “whatever”. The trade off is that.. you just.. don’t.. care! You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. You don’t have to worry about what you’re “gonna be when you grow up”.  You don’t have to impress a man or wear stilettos or thongs. Every day of every age that you are, will feel normal. You will always feel like you. For example, my body is 68, but I can close my eyes and imagine being back in high school, and I am that same consciousness that I was. I can imagine and truly feel like I’m 10 or 15 or 25 years old. It’s because you are your soul, not your body. No matter what the body does on the outside, you will always be you!

    As for death, there is nothing to fear there. You have Spirit Guides and angels who will help you pop out or float out when the time comes. It’s easier than getting out of a car. One second you’re in your body, and the next second you’re looking at your body. You will not feel connected to your body; nobody ever has the desire to get back into the body; they just feel so good to be out of it. Your vision will be acutely clear. Colors will be brighter. You will just “know” things, without effort. You will feel lighter than air, and you will be as happy as a puppy at the beach. People that transitioned before you will be there to welcome and congratulate you .. such as parents and grandparents. You will be accompanied back to your spiritual home base, and your memories of your entire past existence, all the way to the beginning of your soul, will come back to you. You will remember the Divine Source we like to call God.. and you will remember who you are. 

    So, don’t worry, be Happy! Enjoy all of the stages of life, for each one has something valuable to offer, especially if you live right and follow your heart and your instincts.

    You will come to realize that, in virtually every case, the things you feared turned out to be nothing worth worrying about. You were okay. And you will continue to be okay. 

  • Talk to me when you are my age of 61

  • It’s a tad early to start to fret, but we all do at some point.

    I’m 39 and have not had a girlfriend so far and the panic ᴮᵁᵀᵀon is being sought at this point… although unfortunately there is no literal ᴮᵁᵀᵀon to slam.

    You’re 22?

    There is still PLENTY of time to enjoy life… and without doing crazy things. 

  • No but maybe God is trying to get your attention.  If you ask Jesus Christ into your life as Lord and Savior and follow Him as best you can, you will lose your fear of death.  Read the New Testament for more information.  Start with the Gospel of John.  Jesus died for your sins and rose again the third day so that you could avoid hell and have a home in heaven.  Put your faith in Him and He will give you peace, hope and joy.  Confess all known sin to God and ask His forgiveness.  Jesus is a faithful friend.  I recommend Him to you. 

  • i think its normal

  • You could die any day, even if you’re 22. There’s people as young as 3 who die all the time. Death is everywhere and anywhere. A long life isn’t guaranteed for anyone.

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