If so what are some of the signs?
Yes, manipulation is a form of psychological abuse. Signs? Well, if someone is adept at making you feel guilty for things you did not do, or things that are really not a big deal (or things THEY did), that’s a sign. If a person has a pattern of denying any wrongdoing and blaming others, that’s a sign. If they use people, betray trust, lie, cheat, influence others to do things for them that they should be doing for themselves, those are signs. If a person is a taker, and only a giver when it’s convenient for them (or only when they stand to gain something from it), that’s a sign. If you feel like you’ve found yourself in a situation and don’t know how you got there (but realize later that you’ve been conned or misled or coerced into it by someone else)- that’s a sign. If you find yourself waiting by a phone that doesn’t ring, that’s a sign. If you spend time making excuses for someone else’s bad behavior or covering up what they’ve done, that’s a sign. If a person makes you promises but fails to keep them, that’s a sign. If you can’t say no to someone without a fight or argument from them, that’s a sign. Manipulation is a form of control. People who are controlling generally only get more controlling over time. And the more control they have, the more they feel entitled to it.
In general, if you spend a great deal of time feeling sad, betrayed, guilty, depressed, worried, anxious, numb, bitter, angry, isolated or hopeless because of someone else’s actions, behavior, or words…you’re being manipulated….you’re being drained…it will take it’s toll on your mental and physical health. If you get the distinct impression that your partner feels that your needs are not nearly as important as his, that’s a sign.
…Those are all signals that it’s time to get out of that relationship….ASAP.
Emotional or psychological abuse/manipulation may precede physical abuse.
Is Manipulation Abuse
I thought I might add this about covert abuse. Being a victim and counselor for many years. Secret or Covert abuse is really tricky. For example- you ask a question referring to the past words of your parents or etc. Their response- ” I never said that you must have dreamed it” This is secret covert abuse. First it just plain hurts to see them lie. Then second they are saying youre crazy and you cant think correctly. This is usually accompanied by rolling the eyes in a haunty natsy way with an inappropiate facial expression. This is clear abuse. Too bad you dont have email this information coupled with a lawsuit or divorce could be quite profitable.
Yes, although most people do it every now and then w/out even realizing it…..but if you are manipulating in a way that hinders someone else’s well being then of course it’s abuse. If you were to say to a spouse (who really needed some time to him/herself that if they loved you they wouldn’t go out, that would be a mild case of it (you know they need to go out but you’re putting your feelings before theirs in way to ensure their guilt)